Dear Papa Jon…

Q:

So, like, it is still freckin’ raining and I don’t understand why… can mother nature plz figure her shat out?

A:

I mean weather is an interesting topic, for sure! I think that you might be better off staying in a tanning bed and closing your eyes. Maybe you can picture a sunny place and relax. Also, Washington springs are always a fun experience.

Q:

My roommates are pretty good about chores, but they are not doing them. How do I approach this?

A:

Whenever I have issues with my roommates, I just give them a good spanking! Ahaha JK. I think that RHA has some extra roommate agreements that you might be able to pick up and use! Those are the best and ALWAYS fix roommate conflicts.

Q:

I have very bad irritable bowel syndrome and my significant other wants to move in with me… I have not told them that I have this condition and I don’t know how they will react. What do I do?

A:

I think that you should be upfront and open about the situation! I hope that they know that you are beautiful on the inside and the outside, no bowel movement should change that. Poo-pourri is good too!

To submit a question, go to http://ask.fm/DearPapaJon. I can’t wait to hear from you all!! Love, Papa Jon

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  • RHAWA

    Satire can still include real information. Roommate agreements are not for roommate disputes. Come on, man!