The Guidance Counselor

Emily is not a licensed guidance counselor, but neither was Ann Landers.


Q:

Do you consider it cheating to masturbate to other girls on the internet? I don’t like it at all when my partner does it.


A:

Nah, pornography exists in our society because there’s a heavy demand for it. There’s hardly anything intimate about porn for the consumer, and just because your partner finds someone else attractive, it doesn’t make you any less desirable. Otherwise, somebody else being a babe doesn’t detract from you.


Q:

Would you date someone who wouldn’t go down on you but expects oral sex?


A:

No way.


Q:


A:

Well, according to Marilyn Manson, you’ll decrease in size if you try to eat yourself. I wish I had more questions in my inbox so I wouldn’t have to answer your troll junk (hint/nudge).


TTFN,
Emily

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